Wednesday, February 16, 2005
the past couple of weeks have been quite a rough ride for both me and fauzi, but no matter how rough the ride gets, we got through it all and here we are, the both of us, standing tall together hand in hand.. side by side.. even stronger than before. when we met the weekend before the last, we had a great time out with his friends at arab street to celebrate yed's birthday. the surprises i had for him sure amused him greatly. that smile across his face is priceless.
but an unexpected matter came looming over us, especially him, on that dark tuesday. it had hurt him deeply and i'll forever be regretting it. it pained me to see those tears trickling down his cheeks and it was all because of me. that whole day, i didn't even know how to comfort him. we went to bugis but all shops were closed. we met up with his friends in town but it was only an hour later that he felt relieved of a heavy load. he had apparently talked to wan abang and hamdan about what happened and i am so glad in my heart that they were there to listen to what he had to say. the late night movie, constantine, we caught together with hamdan, mamang, wan abang, shasha, yed and omar was also a good move to helping get our moods back on track. the movie was simply hilarious what with its nicely timed humour and effects.
on wednesday, we went to hairul's place for his birthday 'party' and that night, i was to make one of the most difficult choices. i had allowed him to go out with wan abang clubbing. he eventually went to zouk with rahmat too but ended up talking to me on the phone after an hour there because he was missing me too much. hehehe.. that little bugger of mine is so cute ain't he?
on thursday, all of us went to majlis pusat for keris's training. had quite a great time there. heck, i'll always have a great time whenever my baby's around. but what was to come later at night was very much unexpected. yanni, bob, me, fauzi and rahmat decided to have a very open talk when yed and wan abang went to a nearby place to meet up with old friends. the open talk turned out to be a little mistake. bob freaked when yanni revealed a very deep secret to us. i felt bad for yanni who had to bear the brunt of bob's outburst.
the next day, i had to work the whole day and so fauzi and i already made plans to meet up right after i finished work. little did i know i was to be put up for a special surprise. fauzi had come to pick me up and right when i was reaching where he was, he had put on his haversack, a sling bag and a tent in his arms. imagine my gaping mouth when i saw what he was carrying. he had actually planned for us to overnight at east coast that night after going to kak ani's chalet. fast forward after the chalet, we got on to talking about the troubles that came upon us that week as we walked back to our already pitched up tent. after reaching the tent, we sat down by the beach and that was when he took out every single thing that was meant to be a surprise for me. he took out a small bottle of nutella, a box full of huge strawberries and a bottle of grape-vanilla juice!! after that, he took out pieces of paper, a pen, two small bottles of glass deco and a glass bottle which he bought from the gift shop in causeway point. he had actually planned for us to write our feelings, thoughts and promises on paper, put it in the bottle and both of us are to decorate the glass bottle with the glass deco. isn't that just sweet of him?? i actually cried as he took out every single stuff out of his bag. so there we were, feeding each other nutella-dipped strawberries and grape-vanilla juice beside the beach with the cool wind blowing in our faces as we hug each other. that moment was remarkably romantic. i've never felt more lucky than at that moment. after indulging in the food, we headed on back to the tent to, of course, indulge in each other!!! a night never to be forgotten..
when morning came, we woke up supposedly to get ready to go to the cc for my tarian practice but ended up dilly-dallying until the afternoon. i was already as late as it is so i decided to just get home straight instead of going for tarian to get myself ready for the zouk shooting tonight. fauzi's contemporary middle eastern band, bedouin groove, was to have a shooting that night at zouk for arts central. evening came and fauzi, me, omar, yed, amit, zul and wan abang were at zouk waiting for the shooting to start. first up was in front of zouk for an interview between amit, wan abang and omar. after that, we went in and the next interview was between amit, zul and fauzi in the middle of the zouk dance floor. the next and last interview was amit and yed at the most top level of zouk. by then, aida had joined us and i was glad i had a gal pal there to talk to. as the night went by, we waited and waited for wan abang's and amit's collaboration performance with the resident dj at 1.30am. well the time came and fauzi and i danced and danced until the end of performance. after that, there was more interviews outside of zouk before we finally wrapped up. it was definitely a fun night though a bit boring as we couldn't really enjoy the music. the rest went home while me and fauzi went to kallang for supper. we waited for the first train and i went back to his place to sleep that morning.
it's already sunday and it was a day i was truly dreading as he was to book into camp that night. my heart never felt so heavy until that day. by afternoon, we made our way to the cc as i had dikir training. my heart became even more heavier as each minute went by. when it was time for him to go, i sent him till we were outside of the cc and we held on to each other for some time before deciding to let him go so that he won't be late in booking in. well, being the crybaby that i am, i cried as he walked away from me. in my heart, i could never have been able to let him go. i went on with dikir training but my mind was somewhere else. sigh... i was already beginning to miss him terribly though he was only gone for less than four hours.
well, these coming two weekends are going to be busy busy busy for me. i've dikir training tomorrow. this sat, i've dean's little birthday bash at paradigm to go to. then i've got a show over at the bbcc on sunday with dikir training before that. next friday, i'll be performing with de'lust which i hope against hope that taufik batisah will be able to play with us too. it is his show anyway that we are performing at. then saturday, i might be going to kembara seni's show over at sembawang sec if i don't have dikir training. then sunday is already the dikir competition!! sheesh. busy busy... but as long as i have him by my side cheering me on and supporting me all the way, i'll be very happy and content.
fauzi's been my pillar of support for 7 months now. if it wasn't for him, i wouldn't be where i am now. if it wasn't for him, i wouldn't have even dared to dream. he has given me so much hope and love throughout all these months. he's made me believe in myself again. he has one hundred percent faith in me and in whatever that i wish to do. but the one thing i truly admire about him is that he loves me with all of his heart and gives unconditionally without a single complaint. i've got myself a very rare man indeed; a man who gives and loves unconditionally, a man who doesn't complain even though things doesn't go his way, a man who is always ready to serenade his loved one when his loved one feels doubtful.. plus the fact that this particular man looks damn good in tight top and jeans! that ass of his is to die for!! -grins like a cheschire cat- hehehe...
he deserves someone who loves him with all of her heart and who gives as much as he does to the relationship. well, i got to be that lucky someone of his... boy, i'm sure damn lucky!! hehehe... which girl doesn't feel lucky when she gets treated like a spoilt princess??
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