Saturday, June 12, 2004
Strange how men nowadays are so perverted, so psychotic, so conniving, so cruel.
After wat that someone did, I have gone completely hopeless on ever finding a single decent man here on earth, in this lifetime.
Ok maybe I do have someone in mind but considering he and I are only as friends even though it is so obvious that we have feelings for each other and it is because of our reluctance to have a relationship that led us to just be friends. Seriously, I would rather just have him as a friend than let the strings attached from the circumstances of a relationship ruin our bond. Everything takes time. Who knows, if he and I are meant for each other(which I think that we ARE really meant for each other), we'd be together eventually but just not now. He and I know we are not fully ready for a committed relationship currently. The one thing I just love about the friendship I have with him is the brutal honesty we vow to keep between each other. No matter how hurtful the truth is, we are always so honest in our thoughts, opinions and feelings about each other and other stuff. Currently, he is in Sumatra helping out building an orphanage. Sigh, I miss him terribly already and he wont be back until the 21st! Gosh, going into only the 6th day of his absence and I am already missing him like mad. hahaha!! Weird. I guess I just miss talking with him about stuff that ranges from the weather right down to the very deep and confusing like love and life. We were talking on the phone on the nite before he was to go off to Sumatra and he kept saying he was going to miss me, was going to keep thinking of me.. And I could sense his sincerity. I must admit, each and every moment we spent together gave us such pleasure and happiness. We discovered something new about each other and ourselves each time we met(which was only 3 times!! Sad!).
Well at least talking about this guy takes my mind off the other unscrupulous guy. Unfortunately, I got add another person to my list of most hated people on earth. Fortunately, that hate is going to bring upon him his mostly deserved fate maybe soon enough. hahahhaa!! i am just so cruel!! Hey I know it is all up to God but if up to me, he'd be locked up in a cell full of snakes, cockroaches, lizards.. filled with his faeces and urine.. his legs and hands chained to the wall... MUAKAKAKKAKA!!! That is wat he deserves for not giving proper respect to a woman. *hunny's mind getting very active and imagination running wild and evil... heheheheeeeee...*
.jpg)